How London Shaped Me
Pt. 4 of cities that shaped, molded, and made me, the "across the pond" edit
“When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life,” said Dr. Samuel Johnson back in 1777.
I don’t know about Dr. Johnson, but I do know that as a woman, I did tire of London a few times, yet was nowhere near tired of life.
Before any of you come for me, I will go ahead and say this: London is the perfect city, with a major caveat: perfect weather.
The sun just doesn’t shine enough for me.
And I know me well enough to know that I have major seasonal affective disorder.
That doesn’t stop me from visiting and loving it though!
It’s been harder for me to wrap my head around writing up this city, chipping away at the first stone.
The city triggers memories and emotions, but mostly good ones.
I’m also sad because through multiple phone and data losses I just don’t have that many pics of my time from then, but I managed to include a few.😉
As a young girl, I always knew I’d live in London.
It was not a matter of if, but when.
And I made it happen. Twice.
Today’s newsletter: Pt. 4 of cities that shaped, molded, and made me, London edition. Plus Zeitgeist-y!
The first time I lived in London was for a semester in college.
I was poor and naive, but also incredibly adventurous, soaking up every opportunity to explore the city, and mostly by myself.
For some reason, no one wanted to go out to hip hop shows or clubs as much as me.
Just look at them. They were the more “hang at the local pub” type.
Their loss, because during this time I attended one of the most memorable concerts of my life: Lauryn Hill at Brixton Academy. She was in her prime.
Adele was there.
I’m Shindy. I sold my financial content company and now I write this weekly culture, money, and lifestyle Substack. I’m a journalist and bestselling author featured in Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, Business Insider, Bankrate, Cheddar TV, and HuffPost. If you haven’t yet, and would like to join more than 7,200 people on the internet who I call my “shin-siders” then tap this button right hee-ya:
Getting a ticket was serendipity.
I showed up to the Brixton tube station and met a German exchange student named Miriam.
We stood there in the station and as concertgoers arrived, we screamed, “Anyone got tickets? Anyone?!”
She got lucky; someone sold her a ticket and she left me standing there.
Mind you, face value was £17.50 and scalpers were charging £100 and up, which I wasn’t prepared to pay.
As it got closer to showtime, I still hadn’t managed to secure entry.
I made my way toward the doors and a lovely woman took pity on me I guess, selling me her spare ticket for £25.
Other highlights of the semester included visiting Oxford University, Stourhead, Stonehenge, Edinburgh, and Paris, all for the first time.
I also took a ferry across the English channel to visit my French sister in the north of France, who I stayed with the summer I was 16.
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The second time I lived in London was for a two year-stretch straight out of Business School.
My eyes and heart were wide open, ready for a new career and life.
This time, however, was far more formative than before.
I was older, wiser, with one career down and more money, and worked in broadcast news with Brits and Europeans, at a PR firm, and then in marketing for a trade finance company.
I immersed myself into daily culture and life, made even more possible because I lived with my then boyfriend, a born and raised Londoner who worked in finance.
I do know this: London is way more fun when you’re not surviving on £1 corner store samosas and £3 takeaway Camdentown noodles.
After London took me in and spat me out, I emerged better dressed, smarter, more sophisticated, elegant, cultured, and certainly a more worldly person, particularly when it came to an understanding of European sporting events like Formula 1 and footy (aka soccer).
I also learned a lot about how people and the world operate because the city’s social fabric is so entrenched in wealth, classist societal rules, and members clubs that survive only to distinguish the upwardly mobile from the riff raff.
London is perpetually glamorous and cool
As a woman, if you ever want to be humbled quick, then visit London (or Miami).
This is not a bad thing.
No matter how much we’re feeling ourselves, no matter how hot we think we are, when one emerges in the London social scene you will always find someone more beautiful, more effortlessly graceful, who also smells better and is taller than you.
Up until then I’d mostly been in the American south with a short stint in New York City, so my little country bumpkin self was in for a ride.
I toughened up, evolved, and matured into a more aloof, no-FOMO-having, better (and better-dressed) version of myself.
You can cultivate your social circle
Members clubs continue to serve as the social fabric in London.
Longtime clubs like Annabel’s are slowly making their way to New York but these iterations will likely take on different lives of their own.
When I lived in London (and perhaps still) you were generally able to find out someone’s cause célèbre by whether they were going to Soho House or Home House or Morton’s, and later 5 Hertford or Chiltern or Arts Club, yada yada yada.
This was pre-Brexit, so I’ll rely on those who are more in the scene nowadays to tell me what’s what for my visit later this year, like Carson Griffith:
Sure, New York has that gritty, edgy coolness to it but London has that chic, sophisticated thing that endures.
One Direction was on the X Factor
This was before streaming services, and The X Factor was the most popular show on television.
I witnessed the rise of Harry, Zayn, Niall, Louis, and (RIP) Liam from awkward teenage boys to a super group under the tutelage of Simon Cowell.
The other show I was obsessed with was Downton Abbey, perhaps more popular there than in the U.S.
My favorite British-isms
The best part of living with a Brit is you can ask what certain slang or phrases mean without fear of sounding like a tourist.
And in many ways, British-isms just sound better than their American English counterparts.
A few of my faves:
Go on for donkeys: To describe something that takes a long time, like how donkey’s ears are long: “It’s been donkeys since I saw her,” or “The queue was so long, it went on for donkeys.”
Straight away instead of right away. “I’ll get to it straight away.”
Pet hates vs. pet peeves
Holiday vs. vacation: “Holiday makers are spending their time in Spain,” or “I’m on holiday in August.”
Ending past tense phrases with a “t,” e.g., spoilt. “I was spoilt for choice.”
Pronouncing “sixth” like “sik-th” without the x pronouced
Schemes in lieu of programs
Redundant instead of being fired or laid off, “He was made redundant last year.”
Maths vs. math, “He studied maths in school,” which is interesting given they also say,
Sport vs. sports, “He plays sport.”
The only thing we have in common with Brits is the language. That’s it
Everything else is different.
Stay longer or better yet, live there, and you’ll realize our cultures sort of tolerate each other because of the common language, but that’s about it.
Their mannerisms may be more reserved and understated but certainly not their opinions, which can be cruel and cutting; just look what the British tabloids get away with.
I missed the sun. Terribly
I grew up in the American South, and I was absolutely spoilt for sunny, warm, mild weather.
I didn’t even buy my first real winter coat let alone my first “mac” (aka raincoat) until I lived there.
I’ll be honest: there’s a stretch in late April and May and even a couple weeks during the summer when the sun shines brightly and temps push past 75F/24C consistently.
It’s a sight to behold.
English people happily sun themselves until their skin, not used to UV rays, turn a bright lobster pink.
When the sun would emerge, I positioned myself directly under a skylight in the house, to absorb all the vitamin D I could.
But alas, with no UK work sponsorship happening and my ex not proposing, there was no real possibility or purpose for me to stay.
So off to New York I went.
What about you? Have you lived in London, or are you planning a visit soon?
What do you love or hate most about it?
📺 I’m watching:
Outlander, Starz. The SERIES FINALE. Omg. 😢
Beast, Starz. I happened to catch this 2017 Jessie Buckley film and it was tons of bonkers fun! Highly recommended.
Lainey Wilson: Keepin’ Country Cool, Netflix. I love Lainey’s music; I’ve seen her on tour and this doc just proved she is one of the hardest working women in country music.
📚 I’m reading:
Start with Yourself, Emma Grede
I finished! My next letter will be my thoughts on thisFamesick, Lena Dunham. I am not a Girls fan. I couldn’t stand Hannah Horvath’s voice. My copy at the library is ready for pick-up, so I’m going to read this for the culture, from a completely non-fan, uninformed POV, and report back
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Until next time,
Shindy
On Instagram + TikTok
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Loved this! It was so fascinating especially since I’ve never been to London. Your writing style is unmatched! Beautiful shot of you…. 🩷🩷🩷🩷
Lenore🦋🦋🦋🦋