How to host the perfect party
A common sense, ultimate checklist including hand towels, ice, and coatracks, to impress your guests and keep you sane
Oooo (fa) la la the holidays are coming!
And if you find yourself hosting or entertaining this season, then boy do I have the newsletter for you.
I love hosting friends and family—I actually find it easier sometimes having people over, than having to drive or Uber to other places.
Years of attending house parties, dinner parties, corporate events, social functions, galas, and fundraisers have taught me a thing or two about how to make an event go as smoothly as possible for you and everyone else.
A few mindful touches plus common sense, and you’ve got my ultimate hosting and entertaining tips.
Note: There are nuances to consider depending on the size of your party, so I’ve pointed those out where relevant, otherwise all tips apply regardless.
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Create inviting spaces
Make your guests comfortable with spaces that encourage relaxation and engagement:
Open seating: Try to arrange chairs and small furniture around a room, to encourage flow and mingling, and to ensure there’s enough space for guests to move around comfortably.
Holiday-themed decor: Use garlands and lights, advent calendars, or themed elements. There’s inspiration all around on Pinterest and in home magazines.
Pro-tip: Your local florist may have discards like pine branches or cones to sell or give to you, just ask!Photo corner: You may wish to designate an area for photos and you can also add novelties and props to make your event memorable.
If the party extends outdoors: Consider ashtrays, heat lamps, fire pits, drink coolers, and additional trash bins to keep guests happy.
WiFi: It’s up to you whether you want to share your WiFi; you could post it easily so that you won’t be asked. Another secure option would be to setup a guest WiFi user and password
Hire help
You may wish to hire help especially for larger events. Even just one person in charge of reheating food, wiping off countertops, taking out the trash, and checking on bathrooms can be the ultimate party life saver.
Consider TaskRabbit, NextDoor, or catering services for help.
Or ask and delegate tasks to willing friends, neighbors, or family members.
Simplify the menu
Unless you’re hosting a small dinner party where you can mostly manage the cooking and serving on your own, large affairs will require a buffet-style setup.
Include easy-to-eat finger foods, and 2 to 3 heartier entrées (consider one veggie option) plenty of sides, and several dessert options, with no limit to smaller treats.
Be mindful of allergies and ask guests in advance if they have any preferences—not everything has to honor all requests, but some should.
If you’re ordering catering instead of cooking, then plan and place your order in advance. While we all procrastinate, you’ll want know your options and at what cost, as soon as possible.
Likewise, it’s probably not the best idea to cook a brand new recipe the day of your event. Save yourself the stress!
Otherwise, prepare and pre-cook as much as you can before the day.
Stock plenty of beverages
Offer wine, beer, and even a festive cocktail if you want to make the effort.
Include plenty of non-alcoholic options, too, like sparkling water or mocktails.
You will also need more ice than you think. Don’t underestimate how quickly it runs out. Keep it in a cooler in a garage on the day of until it’s needed.
Entertain your guests
Performances: You may wish to hire a DJ or small band or stringed group, if your budget allows, otherwise…
Music and playlists: Depending on who’s attending and the theme of the night, the default volume should be at a conversational decibel, so that guests can mix and mingle without shouting.
As for playlists, there are plenty of holiday mixes to capture the right atmosphere and vibe. More tedious would be creating your own playlist from scratch—just start early.If streaming from a music service, then I would also suggest a crossfade setting so that songs are flowing continuously and without any pauses in between.
Keep it comfortable
I tend to set my thermostat a little cooler during parties because people are milling around and warming things up with their body heat by default.
Dim the lights
Lights should not be at their brightest setting and can be dimmed to where you can still recognize someone from across a room, and so that no light is ever shining directly or brightly onto someone’s face.
If you don’t have dimmers, then consider inexpensive dimmable bulbs that are easily controlled by an app on your phone; they can also be set to timers and with many colors, too. Or, turn off overhead lights and rely on warmly-lit lamps to create the ambience.
Designate a drinks station
If you’re not hiring a bartender, then there’s no way to make every drink yourself.
So make it easy for guests by designating an area away from the food, like a countertop or island corner, where they can help themselves to drinks, booze and ice.
Designate a trash area
Same as the drinks station, you’ll want to provide a clearly obvious space for trash; consider multiple bins in dedicated areas so there’s no confusion about where to place garbage.
Don’t be surprised at how disrespectful guests can be if there aren’t sufficient trash bins around!
On coats and shoes
Coats: If you can hang up your guests’ coats for them, then great! But for larger parties, that’s not possible and they’ll understand.
Regardless, invest in a decent coat or garment rack, which can be stowed in a hallway, front room or space where you can stow people’s coats and accessories neatly and safely.Shoes: Larger parties
If you typically don’t wear shoes in your home, then you may need to make an exception for one evening because unless you’re part of a culture where shoes aren’t traditionally worn in the house, your guests may feel uncomfortable about removing their shoes for a party.Shoes: Smaller parties
When I have a smaller group over, I definitely request shoes to come off, and I offer simple slippers or slides I’ve collected from hotels or purchased at small Asian housewares shops, like these from Daiso or these from MUJI. I have probably 20 to 30 pairs on offer.
Make a pleasant bathroom
You want your powder room or bathroom to offer guests a respite from what’s going on outside of it.
So, make it as inviting as possible with these touches:
Dim the lights: Lower the lights for a more intimate and elegant touch
Candles: Scented candles or tea lights in nice holders add a cozy and elegant ambience, especially with dimmed lights. If you're opposed to lighting candles, then these candle warmers that are like mini hot plates and can coax out a scent without a potential fire hazard
Flowers: Space permitting, a few flowers or a petit bouquet in a small vase can add a nice touch, especially if they include seasonal flowers and colors
Tissues and towels: Offer tissues and disposable hand towels, or cotton towels. If the latter, then have several, because no one wants to use the same soggy hand towel over and over
Supplies: An additional and thoughtful touch is to offer toothpick flossers or feminine products in small glass containers or baskets
Finally, check the bathroom throughout the night to make sure someone hasn’t totally abused it.
And for you, the host
As the host, your job is to spend time with your guests and make them feel important and welcome.
Of course, you can’t give your full attention to any one person, so make them comfortable with warm introductions to other guests, and by starting conversations to encourage mixing and mingling.
Guests take cues from the host, and if a host is having fun, then they will, too.
Cut out any self-deprecating behaviors; if someone offers a compliment about anything—your outfit, food, house, dog, whatever—a simple and gracious thank you will do.
If something doesn’t go to plan, then don’t panic or fret; a frazzled host sets a weird tone and makes people uncomfortable.
Your guests didn’t come to see you implode. They came to have a good time.
Finally, give each person some attention, and make them feel the kings and queens of the world so they’ll be happy they came.
What about you? Are you hosting this year? Any tips you want to share?
Did I miss anything, or want me to expand on any details?
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Until next time,
Shindy
On Instagram + TikTok
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